Sunday, March 18, 2012

NINGER SCHOOL 101

Koonitchywhaaatddddephoooook,


Do you want to learn how to be a ninger? If you don't know what a ninger is, that's ok, I'm going to tell you in the next sentence. (predict what i'm going to say in the next sentence) A ninger is a ghetto ninja, nin=ninja, ger=n*ger. You have succeeded step one of how to be a ninger, knowing the future.


1. Know what will happen in the future.

2. Be silent but know how to mouth cuss words because you're a also niger.

3. Move as quietly and stealthy as posible but put at least three feet between your two feet and put most of
your body weight behind you, like a black man.

4. Never, I repeat, never, tell anyone you're a ninger. You need to know how to keep your identity. Who ever tells anyone they are a ninger, they will eventually be assassinated, says the Ningod.

5. Only fight, if your heart desires. "One's heart,will start a fart," said the Ningeneral, Lawson Wong.
Fart means, "a person's good deeds, fabulous+art=fart."

6. Always carry around a samurai sword but you will also need to carry around a pistol just incase.

7. Know how to use your body as the only weapon.

8. Meditate once a week for at least an hour. This will strengthen your ability to ask Ningod for help.

9. Watch more killing movies. The kind of movie you'd want to watch is "Kill Bill", "Assassin", "Ip Man", "Menace II Society", "Boyz 'N The Hood", etc.


If you follow these 9 simple steps, you will be a successful ninger. No one, I repeat, no one will mess with you ever again if you are a ninger.

Love,
Asian Occasion    

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